Moving or Renovating? Here's a List of the Latest Housing Amenities Geared Toward Tweens

'Looks like the Big Apple is getting more hospitable for families with tweens. NYC never lacks for luxury nor trend, and the latest in Manhattan real estate is all about tweens. Luxe amenities in the newest condos in New York offer tweens spaces to socialize, exercise, game, and even create music. Standouts include:

• A sound-attenuating music practice room in the Brooklyn Trust Company Building (Brookly) where tweens can set up their drum kits and guitars and rock-out without disturbing the neighbors
• The indoor basketball court at 221 West 77 (UWS)
• The vintage gaming room at 111 Murray (TriBeCa) that features foosball, ping pong, and vintage arcade games (retro fun for the parents too)
• Robert Stern's townhouses at 20 East End also have a gaming room called a "Junior Lounge" for their residents ages 7-18 (UES)
• A first-of-its-kind building ringing the north edge of Central Park in Harlem/Morningside Heights will be Circa Central Park, and their plans include a video gaming room and free rentals of remote-control model sailboats, skateboards and bikes for taking advantage of the Park

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The Secret Language of Tweens - a Guide to Text Abbreviations

A St. Louis TV station, Channel 5, came out with a story this week about the abbreviations that tweens using when texting, and the list might surprise you. In addition to what you would expect as standard short-hand, the list includes "codes" covering everything from whether a parent is in the room ("POS" for "parents over shoulder") to finding a party ("WTPA" for "where the party at") to hooking up ("MIRL" for "meet in real life" and "NIFOC" for "nude in front of computer").

If your tween has a smartphone - and many do, including the DDs of yours truly - it is critical to talk early and often about the standards of conduct that your family has for ALL communications. For a primer on a Digital House Rules for your family, see this oldie-but-goodie article here.

Here is the full list of over 100 tween text abbreviations:

1. 143 - I love you

2. 2DAY - Today

3. 4EAE - For ever and ever

4. ADN - Any day now

5. AFAIK - As far as I know

6. AFK - Away from keyboard

7. ASL - Age/sex/location

8. ATM - At the moment

9.  BFN - Bye for now

10. BOL - Be on later

11. BRB - Be right back

12.  BTW - By the way

13. CTN - Can’t talk now

14. DWBH - Don’t worry, be happy

15.  F2F or FTF - Face to face

16.  FWB - Friends with benefits

17.  FYEO - For your eyes only

18. GAL – Get a life

19. GB - Goodbye

20. GLHF - Good luck, have fun

21. GTG - Got to go

22. GYPO - Get your pants off

23. HAK - Hugs and kisses

24. HAND - Have a nice day

25. HTH - Hope this helps / Happy to help

26. HW - Homework

27. IDK - I don’t know

28. IIRC - If I remember correctly

29. IKR - I know, right?

30. ILY / ILU - I love you

31. IM - Instant message

32. IMHO - In my honest opinion / In my humble opinion

33. IMO - In my opinion

34. IRL - In real life

35. IWSN - I want sex now

36. IU2U - It’s up to you

37. IYKWIM - If you know what I mean

38. J/K - Just kidding

39. J4F - Just for fun

40. JIC - Just in case

41. JSYK - Just so you know

42. KFY - Kiss for you

43. KPC - Keeping parents clueless

44. L8 - Late

45. LMBO - Laughing my butt off

46. LMIRL – Let’s meet in real life

47. LMK - Let me know

48. LOL - Laugh out loud

49. LSR - Loser

50. MIRL - Meet in real life

51. MOS - Mom over shoulder

52. NAGI - Not a good idea

53. NIFOC - Nude in front of computer

54. NM - Never mind

55. NMU - Not much, you?

56. NP - No problem

57. NTS - Note to self

58. OIC - Oh I see

59.  OMG - Oh my God

60. ORLY - Oh, really?

61. OT - Off topic

62. OTP- On the phone

63. P911- Parent alert

64. PAW - Parents are watching

65. PCM - Please call me

66. PIR - Parent in room

67. PLS or PLZ - Please

68. PPL - People

69. POS - Parents over shoulder

70. PTB - Please text back

71. QQ - Crying. This abbreviation produces an emoticon in text. It’s often used sarcastically.

72. RAK - Random act of kindness

73. RL - Real life

74. ROFL - Rolling on the floor laughing

75.  RT - Retweet

76. RUOK - Are you okay?

77. SMH - Shaking my head

78. SOS - Someone over shoulder

79. SRSLY- Seriously

80. SSDD - Same stuff, different day

81.  SWAK - Sealed with a kiss

82. SWYP - So, what’s your problem?

83. SYS - See you soon

84. TBC - To be continued

85. TDTM -Talk dirty to me

86. TIME - Tears in my eyes

87. WYCM - Will you call me?

88. TMI - Too much information

89. TMRW - Tomorrow

90.  TTYL - Talk to you later

91.  TY or TU - Thank you

92. VSF - Very sad face

93. WB - Welcome back

94. WTH - What the heck?

95.  WTPA - Where the party at?

96.  WYCM - Will you call me?

97. YGM - You’ve got mail

98. YOLO - You only live once

99. YW - You’re welcome

100. ZOMG - Oh my God (sarcastic)

101. 182 - I hate you

102. 420 - Marijuana

103. ADR - Address

104. CD9 - Code 9 - it means parents are around

105. ILU - I Love You

106. KOTL - Kiss On The Lips

107. LMIRL - Let's Meet In Real Life

108. NIFOC - Nude In Front Of The Computer

109. P999 - Parent Alert

110. PAL - Parents Are Listening -or- Peace And Love

111. RU/18 - Are You Over 18?

112. WYRN - What's Your Real Name?

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Lip Smackers Live On!

Moms of all tweens and tweens alike, rejoice: Lip Smackers has been brought back from the brink! Last January, Lip Smackers' manufacturer, The Bonne Bell Company, announced that it was closing shop. The scent of the Dr. Pepper Biggy was a constant in my lip gloss rotation from my own tween years, and as a mom I bought these for my own tweens (Lip Smackers make excellent stocking stuffers, Easter Egg fillers, and birthday gift toppers!). 'Twas devastating news to lose this cultural icon. Luckily for tweens and tweens-at-heart everywhere, the Lip Smackers brand has been brought back into production by the new company owner, Markwins International Corp.
Dr. Pepper, the classic "Biggy"s, Cotton Candy, and Bubble Gum, smack on!

(P.S. Sadly the Thin Mint Lip Smackers are discontinued - but maybe we can start a campaign lobby the Girl Scouts to bring them back?
P.P.S. Your eyes do not deceive you: that IS a Swarovski-encrusted Lip Smacker Biggy!)

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Upcoming Book on Parenting Tweens/ Teens Offers Counter-Intuitive Advice

Teacher Tyler Durman has a new book coming out next month that offers some counter-intuitive advice to parents of tween and teens. We've not had a chance to read it as yet, but here is a preview from "Counter-Intuitive: What 4 Million Teenagers Wish We Knew":

• Being your tween's friend is the worst thing you can be
• Welcome disrespect
• Create boundaries that kids will like

In the era of helicopter parenting, this is a refreshing perspective to add to the parenting discussion, and we are eagerly awaiting our copy to review.

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Marketing to Tweens - It's Big Business

How big? Try $200 billion dollars a year. And that's just by kids ages 9-13 years old.
NPR did a story today on how major brands, such as Kotex, Dove, Aerie, and Pink are targeting tween girls to turn them into life-long customers. It's savvy marketing for sure, and even though companies say that they're targeting, say, the college-age crowd (like Pink by Victoria's Secret), the reality is that media-savvy tweens are well within range of their marketing.
Advertising in pervasive and can, in fact, be used for good (check out last week's post on the Canadian Safe Schools Network campaign called "Tweens Read Mean Tweets", which is riffing off of Jimmy Kimmel's show, or Dove's #selfie campaign). Make sure that your tween is equally as savvy in knowing when she's been sold to.

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Tweens Read Mean Tweets

CAUTION: this video contains direct and rude language and kids should be view it with along with a responsible adult.

Riffing off of Jimmy Kimmel's "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets" bit, the Canadian Safe Schools Network has created a video of tweens reading mean tweets as a way to shine a light on cyberbulling. It's powerful stuff and worth your time. Kudos to the organization for this effort - it is well done and relatable.

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Instagram: Where Tween Girls Hangout

The ever-illuminating Rachel Simmons has just posted a piece on Time.com titled "The Secret Language of Girls on Instagram". It's a must-read item for all parents of tweens. Rachel discusses how girls' social currency and status is cultivated on Instagram and what parents need to understand about the platform (hint: it's not just for sharing pics).

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An Online Support Group for Parents of Tweens, Teens

We just got word of a new online support group for parents of tweens and teens. It's run by the University of Wisconsin, Madison and is called My Parenthetical (get it?). The site offers recent research, Q&A, blog posts, and an opportunity to post questions to a discussion board. The entire site is moderated by family researchers at the University. Some posts that piqued are interest are discussions related to homework tips and how to balance setting boundaries with granting freedoms. Pretty cool, in our books. Check it out!

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45% of Teens Would Change Their Online Behavior If They Knew Their Parents Were Watching.

The online security company McAfee has just published their annual report on "Teens and Screens", and the findings are prescriptive for us as parents. While most social networking sites' Terms of Service limit usage by tweens, many tweens use them anyways.  See below for a great infographic summarizing the report's findings; highlights from this report include:

• Nearly half (45%) of teens said that they would change their online behaviors if they knew that their parents were watching. Do you know how your tween behaves online? Do you know their virtual friends and hangouts?
• Nearly half (49%) of teens regretted something they've posted online - this despite being told that anything posted online is forever (yes, even SnapChat).
• More than half (52%) of teens do not turn off their GPS or location services on their smartphones. This means that online strangers can find your teen IRL (in-real-life).

For LOTS of tips on how to approach tech with your tween, check out our article on Creating a Family Technology Policy.

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Bar Mitzvah Fashion - 13 Year Old Tween Zeke Aspires to Esquire Style

It's not often that one hears about tween boys and fashion in the same sentence, so we were pleasantly surprised to stumble upon this post by 13-year old Zeke in Esquire magazine.  Not only does Zeke have style, but he can write to-boot! Check out his quest for the perfect, modern yet young bar mitzvah suit.

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Tween Designer Launches Line at Nordstrom

Be prepared to learn a new name in fashion: Isabella Rose Taylor. She's a twelve-year-old tween from Austin, TX who just sold her line to Nordstrom. The retailer will be carrying Ms. Taylor's line for the Back to School season this year and just showcased it at the fashion trade show WWD Magic Show in Las Vegas last week.

According to the young designer, “My clothing collection targets tweens/teens. I am designing for my peers. We want to be fashionable but we also want to be comfortable. My current Spring/Summer 2014 Collection mixes fun prints and patterns for what I call a hippie-grunge vibe.”
Below are a few pieces currently available from the designer's website:

Downtown Jersey Sweatshirt, $45

Silver In a Cinch Dress with magenta exposed zipper, $40 (on sale)

Very, very cool!

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Sign the Petition to Create a Disabled American Girl Doll of the Year

Loyal readers know that we are HUGE fans of American Girl. That's why we were so moved to learn about the petition by tween sisters Melissa and YingYing Shang to lobby American Girl President, Jean McKenzie to create a disabled American Girl doll.

Melissa is 10 years old and has a form of muscular dystrophy - and she's also a huge American Girl fan. In her words, "Girls of the Year have helped me understand how it feels to be someone else. However, none of the American Girl Girls of the Year are like me. None of them have a disability."  Melissa writes about how American Girl has helped her to learn what it's like to be a girl who has a passion for gymnastics (like McKenna) or art (like Saige). She'd love for the company to help tell the story of other American girls like her who have a disability.

We think that Melissa is spot-on and that creating a disabled American Girl doll will only help to further the company's mission to teach empathy and inspire girls around the world. To sign Melissa's petition, go to Change.org

You can view a message from Melissa herself here:

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Tweens, Selfies and Royals

If your tween loves selfies, she's in good company - royal company, even. Check out Prince William and his selfie with 12-year old tween on Christmas Day: http://www.vanityfair.com/online/daily/2013/12/prince-william-tween-rare-royal-selfie

image via SWNS

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Make a Thanksgiving Care Package With Your Tween

We are big fans of Daily Candy, and today they posted a terrific video about to make a Thanksgiving care package to send to a homeless shelter near you. What we particularly love about this project is that it involves your kid.
'Hope your Thanksgiving is full of laughter and love.



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Tween Reads Book Festival - October 19th!

Our tweens LOVE seeing their favorite authors, and we've covered our fair share of book talks and book signings here in D.C. (In fact, this past Friday night found our tween at Wilson High School listening to an amazing talk by Rick Riordan - and she came back with a Camp Jupiter tee to boot! But I digress . . .)
If you are lucky enough to find yourself in Houston, Texas this Saturday, October 19th, check out the Tweens Read Book Festival. The line-up of authors looks incredible and includes Shannon Hale, D.J. Machale, Lisa Greenwald, Lisi Harrison, Jude Watson, and T.A. Barron!

Last year's festival drew 750 kids; this year it's being held at South Houston High School.
 If you go, please send us your post, and we'll share it with all of our followers!
Happy reading!

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Update from the Discovery Girls Tween Summit

Check out this terrific interview of two tween sisters from Kansas City as they talk about their experience at the Discovery Girls Tween Summit:



The sisters talk bullying, technology, and giving tweens a voice.

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Tween's Review of Disney "Teen Beach Movie"

Did you know that you can watch the new Disney "Teen Beach Movie" before it premieres on Disney Channel tomorrow night? The WATCH Disney Channel app allows you to watch exclusive content in advance. Our tween downloaded the app (with mom's permission) onto her iTouch. It prompted us to login our Xfinity credentials, and then she was off and running! 

She watches all of her favorite Disney Channel shows like Austin & Ally, A.N.T. Farm, Jessie, and Good Luck Charlie  This week she saw the promo to watch the new "Teen Beach Movie" BEFORE the premiere on Friday, July 19th - she jumped on the link! 

Here is her review:

I think that "Teen Beach Movie" was a movie that I'll watch over and over again because it was so fun to listen and dance to the 1962 musical numbers. I also loved the amazing choreography and synchronization. Teen Beach Movie is mainly about being young and enjoying life and not to be to anxious to grow up. The one thing I didn't like was that Lescamanbear and the mad scientist were defeated so easily. 

New Video Game Trains Girl Superheroes

This bit caught our eye: PBS has developed a new video game in which tween and teen girls build avatars and get trained as superheroes. The game is called "Wonder City" and is a follow-up to the film, "Wonder Women! The Untold Story of American Superheroine".
Instead of dressing up, getting a makeover, or climbing the social ladder, girls earn points for leadership skills, improving the reputation of women in the media, and the like. Three cheers for that!

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Emma Watson Warns That Social Media Is Shortening Childhood

The actress who earned fame as a tween stars in a new film in which social media looms large. While at Cannes promoting her new film, The Bling Ring by Sofia Coppola, Ms. Watson said, " I think it’s amazing how self-aware people are becoming as a result of constantly posting images on Facebook and Instagram. They’re blissfully unaware their childhoods are being shortened. That period of time when you’re not self-conscious is sped up."

During an interview,  she added, "I think technology is playing a really big part in a sense that everything has started moving so much quicker. We are becoming saturated with images. They can embody whatever they [fans] project onto that image. It’s very different; it has very little to do with reality."

Ms. Coppola added, "The idea of no privacy has become the norm."

Managing social media for tweens has been a challenge of modern parenting. Our tips for managing the digital footprint of your tween and creating a family technology policy can be found here - please add your tips! 

Original article at the U.K. Daily Mail here: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2325875/Emma-Watson-blames-social-media-shortening-childhood.html

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A Family Technology Policy For You and Your Tween

In 2011, we sat down to discuss the topic of digital literacy and tween girls. Our interview was selected by the Alliance for Women in Media for their "Special Report on Digital Literacy for Women and Girls".

The full article and more tips on how to craft a technology policy for your family is available below:
Kids should be taught to go online in stages appropriate to their age, and parents need to monitor their children’s activity online. Here are some tips for parents:

• Create a family technology policy. Articulate clearly what your expectations are with respect to how mobile phones, television viewing, Internet browsing, YouTube watching, texting, etc., are acceptable for your family. You should share and discuss this policy with your kids so that they are clear on the behavior expectations and the reasons why. The ethics you enforce in real life absolutely extend to your kids' digital lives.
• Trust but verify: There are settings on every major browser that enable “safe search” — which is essentially search result listings of questionable sites or sites with adult content being blocked from display. Clearly this is a form of censorship, and it’s not too different from the settings on one’s cable box that block out channels based on a parent’s preference. Parents should check the browsing history on all computers in the home regularly. Not only is this a list of where your kids have gone online, but it provides insight into the kind of information they are looking for and what they really use the Internet for (so you can tell if “online research” includes Facebook or not). Parents should “Google” their kid’s names a few times a year to keep tabs on what information strangers can find about your child. With mobile phones, most major carriers offer text plans that not only help you to budget text usage but also monitor the texts. Some carriers charge a fee while others do not — it varies a great deal. You can also look for a plan option that backs-up the information on a phone (very helpful for the address book feature) and monitor photos taken with the phone. Just like with their Facebook account (see below), we require the passwords to their phones.
• One rule in our household is that all browsing MUST happen at the dining table or living room; computers are not allowed in bedrooms. Publicly viewed screens have a “fresh air” effect on browsing.
• If your kids are under the age of 13 and want to join Facebook, consider setting up a Facebook account for the entire family instead of each member of the family. Check your privacy settings frequently on Facebook (the default settings change often). For our kids over the age 13 with their own Facebook accounts, we don't require that they "Friend" us as parents - rather, we require their Facebook passwords (yes, this is a quid pro quo for having their own account).
• Another household rule with mobile phones that you might find helpful: store all phones in a central place (i.e., NOT in the child’s room). Not only does it help to mitigate the morning scramble and ensure sleep, but it prevents the late-night, unmonitored text sessions. 
• An ostrich strategy won’t work when it comes to technology. If you don’t know how to text, learn; if you don’t know what Facebook or Twitter are, spend some time poking around on those sites; and if you don’t know what you don’t know, ask other parents what they’re monitoring online. Apps on both mobile phones and Facebook change all the time (witness Ask is the new Formspring, and SnapChat is the new Chat Roulette) - knowing what apps your tween has downloaded and opted to plug-in-to, is critical. 
• Some of the best ways to parent include modeling the behaviors we want to see in our children. While we often think of that in the context of manners, speech, and ethics, the same applies to online behaviors.Focus on the positives of technology and what it offers to your kids; girls especially need to be comfortable with technology in today’s world. 
• Tips for teaching kids to go online safely: Kids need to know that just because they read something online, it is not necessarily true. They should learn which sites are trusted for research information and to check the footnotes, bibliography and sources for any online research. Kids should keep a running list of online bookmarks for any research project. Sites such as Delicious make this easy to both save and organize, and it’s incredibly helpful to have a list of their sources available with a single click. Avoid using both their first and last name together for any login, username, or screename. NEVER enter their address online – this should ONLY be done by a parent.
• Sit down together in front of the computer to research something. This summer we were looking for a new tank filter for our turtle, and this exercise was really helpful for our girls to see how we searched for information, the kinds of terms and phrases we used, and which sites we chose to visit and which ones we chose not to and why. The parent should narrate what they’re doing and thinking at each step in the process. We do exactly this kind of task-based testing in the development world when developing applications, and it is extremely valuable. This same exercise can also be done when going onto the family Facebook account and reading through Wall posts, viewing photos, finding friends, etc. 
• Kids should understand that information posted online has a very long “half-life.” This means not only that anyone can find that goofy photo they took with their friends junior year, but that photo will come up when someone searches for them 5 or 10 years from now — and folks they care about (such as college admission officers, job interviewers, scholarship committees, coaches) will most assuredly search for them online. This is a tough reality to confront as it means that all of the trials and tribulations of growing up and the mistakes that come with it are on public display. We can’t stuff that genie back in the bottle, but being cognizant of it is vital.
• Be picky. Kids should be very selective in which sites they chose to use for research and which communities they choose to join. Discuss with them the merits of one social network over another, why one source for research is better than another, etc. With such vastness of information, it's important to learn to filter it well. They should be selective with their time and what information they share online — VERY selective.
  
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