Monday, January 31, 2011

Tween's New Year Resolution: To Model Health and Happiness For Tweens

Here's one last resolution for consideration in 2011: role modeling health and happiness for our tween daughters. Like a few of our other resolutions, this one is for both tweens and their parents. We wrote about this topic earlier when First Lady Michelle Obama explained in an interview that "Throughout my life, I've learned to make choices that make me happy and make sense for me. Even my husband is happier when I'm happy. So I have freed myself to put me on the priority list and say, yes, I can make choices that make me happy, and it will ripple and benefit my kids, my husband and my physical health."

Making time for ourselves as moms is especially challenging given the demands of work, parenting, marriage - you name it. Personally, I can use all the positive reinforcement I can get, so I'm going to borrow the First Lady's motivation for sticking to a regular workout schedule and use Mrs. Obama's counsel "to put me on the priority list."

This will be easier said than done as self-sacrifice has become the m.o. in our parenting career. But after this month of sharing our resolutions and all of the great comments from readers, it became clear that the choices we make (especially publicly stated ones, like resolutions) and the deliberate actions we take have a visible impact on our tween daughters. If we want them to grow into women with a healthy, positive body image, we've got to start with walking the walk. So, 2011, here we go.

Check out our full list of 2011 Tween's New Year Resolutions (see the upper right corner of the blog), and tell us what you thought about this series.

Photo credit: O Magazine

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"Mockingjay" Released Tomorrow: Here's Suzanne Collins Reading Chapter One

"Mockingjay", the final book of tween favorite "The Hunger Games" series, will be released tomorrow. In case you missed it, here's author Suzanne Collins reading Chapter 1 of the book (also on our YouTube channel):



And we mentioned earlier that "The Hunger Games" movie was in the works - and now there's a release date: 3/23/12

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Friday, January 28, 2011

Happiness = Achievement? Yet Another Way the Tiger Mother Got It All Wrong

We have admired the science-based parenting advice of Christine Carter for some time now, and her response to the "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother" is a must-read. Her take that Amy Chua's focus on achievement is at the expense of resiliency is spot-on. Here's an excerpt from her article:

"Chua is prescribing life motivated by perfectionism—fear of failure, fear of disappointment.  Not only is this a vicious form of unhappiness, but research by Carol Dweck and many others shows that kids who are not allowed to make mistakes don’t develop the resilience or grit they need later in life to overcome challenges, or pick themselves up when they do fail. Perfectionists are far more likely to be depressed, anxious, and in college, they are more likely to commit suicide."

Ms. Carter is a Ph.D, a sociologist and happiness expert at U.C. Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center. She will be in Washington, D.C. to lead a workshop on positive parenting on February 26th.

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New "Stomp Out Bullying" Video From Mean Girls 2

Did you catch the "Mean Girls 2" movie on ABC Family earlier this week? The made-for-TV movie has been critically panned, but the anti-bullying PSA coming out of it has been well-received. "Mean Girls 2" star Meaghan Martin (of Camp Rock fame) is also in the PSA; she recorded the video for StompOutBullying.org (as did Demi Lovato in 2009). BTW, the 8th annual No Name Calling Week is January 24-28, 2011.


Jennifer Stone also stars in the movie, and poor reviews aside, we thought Ms. Martin's minimal make-up and low-maintenance wardrobe was a refreshing and positive change-of-pace.



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First Tweens Malia and Sasha Obama Shine During Chinese State Visit

Last week Chinese President Hu Jintao made an official State Visit to Washington, D.C. and was honored by a State Dinner at the White House. First Tweens Malia and Sasha Obama attended both events and made quite an impression on the Chinese President.

Nine year old Sasha Obama is learning Mandarin at school (she attends Sidwell Friends School) and got to practice her Chinese with President Hu. The younger Ms. Obama and her classmates attended the welcoming ceremony for President Hu on the White House lawn, and President Obama paused in the receiving line to introduce the Chinese President to his daughter.

Both Presidential daughters also attended the State Dinner later in the week, and the fashion world was abuzz with Malia Obama wardrobe at the event. The elder Ms. Obama wore a fun, sparkly dress by American designer Chris Benz. The dress was a beautiful shade of mermaid green, and the 12-year old made it age-appropriate by pairing it with a simple shrug sweater. Both Obama daughters looked beautiful at the event; no word on who designed Sasha Obama's black and gold dress.

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Thursday, January 27, 2011

Perfect Idea for a Snow Day With Tweens: A S'Mores Stand

Here's a great idea for an entrepreneurial tween on a snow day: a s'mores and hot chocolate stand. The idea is the same as the classic summer lemonade stand but extended to your favorite neighborhood sledding spot.

Here's how:
  • Make a batch of s'mores at home (see our recipe here) and wrap each in tin foil
  • Whip up some hot chocolate and pour it into a big thermos (the kind that you lug to soccer games will work perfectly)
  • Draw a colorful sign that lists what you're selling and how much it costs (e.g. $0.50/s'more). Bonus points for deciding to donate your proceeds to your favorite charity - be sure your sign tells everyone which organization you're supporting! Need a list of great causes for tweens? Here are some ideas: 
  • Load a sled with a basket of the foil-wrapped s'mores, the thermos, a stack of napkins, a sleeve of cups, and a bowl of extra marshmallows and bring it with you to your neighborhood park/slope/hill
  • Watch the crowds of hungry sledders swarm your sled!
Thermos from Pylones, $44

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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Silly Bandz Misses With Kardashians But Recovers With Custom Bandz

Silly Bandz were the hot tween accessory/collectible last year, but the company's latest addition of Kardashian Silly Bandz is oh-so-2010. Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez Silly Bandz seem age-appropriate for tweens, but these? Not so much.

On a more positive note, the company now offers custom Silly Bandz. While pricey (the minimum order is for 5000 of each shape at $0.16/each - this adds up to about $800), these could be great for school or camp fundraisers, a joint Bat Mitzvah party, etc. We wish these were around when we had Twixt!



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Madeline at the White House - Book Signing for Young Tweens This Week

The Madeline series is hallowed reading in our house, and even our older tweens still love these books for the main character's moxie. Although author Ludwig Bemelmans passed away years, ago, his grandson, John Bemelmans Marciano, has picked up where the author left off.

The elder Mr. Bemelmans began the story of "Madeline at the White House" in 1961 but never finished it. Mr. Bemelmans-Marciano completes the story and brings it to life in the book which will be released tomorrow. In this version, Madeline and eleven classmates visit Washington for the annual Easter Egg Roll as special guests of the President's daughter. The illustrations beautifully showcase the District at night, and we wonder how this new book compares with how First Tweens Malia and Sasha Obama find living in the White House.

The younger Mr. Bemelmans-Marciano will be signing copies of the book at our fave D.C. bookstore, Politics and Prose, this week on Thursday, January 27th at 10:30am.

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A Floating Dance Club for Tweens

Whoa! We just came across this video showcasing the new dance club for tweens only aboard Disney's Cruise Ships. It's called "Edge" and features a dance floor, Wii hangout area, and an 18-foot long green screen on which tweens can superimpose themselves onto postcards and video karaoke. Have you seen this? We've not been on this cruise, but a fun lounge area just for tweens sounds very, very cool.



Edge seems like Disney's answer to the new Club Rush at the Atlantis resort in the Bahamas. Like Edge, Club Rush offers a tweens only hangout space with gaming, dance floors, a live DJ, and its own concert series.


Both tween clubs feature technology heavily, including computers to post Facebook updates and resort-only chat networks. To be honest, I'm not sure I'm crazy about the idea of our tweens being plugged in while on vacation, but the dance and music parts of the clubs do sound age-appropriate and like tween heaven. And if hanging out for a bit at such clubs on vacation makes it easier for our tweens to make friends with other kids their age, well, that's even better.

Both Edge and Club Rush are brand new - we hope we can check them out before our tweens get too old for them! Have you visited? What did you think? Was it cool, or are they trying too hard?

Bonus question: Does your community/city/town have a dance-club-venue for tweens (think: an under-21 club like in "StarStruck")? If so, what does your tween think about them? It got us thinking: tweens love to dance, but aside from Wii/Xbox and the occasional school event, there really doesn't seem to be anywhere for them have dance parties. We love that they have their pajama-themed karaoke/dance party thing at sleepovers every now and then, but we wondered if there wasn't something else out there.

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Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Tween's New Year Resolution: Cook As a Family

Truthfully, this resolution is more for me, the mom, than the tweens. They would all gladly cook more. It's me, the control-freak, who has a fit every time the milk spills, flour gets on the floor, eggshell bits fall in the bowl, etc.

Well, I need to get over myself, so this year I resolve to ease up on the tweens in the kitchen and let them help cook. There are articles galore about the link between cooking and making better food choices, so there's incentive enough.

Our list of fave blogs to help us get dinner on the table:
  • The Family Dinner - you may remember their Treasure Bowl idea we blogged about earlier
  • Dash and Bella - an irreverent blog about the trials and tribulations of raising young foodies
  • Dinner A Love Story - AMAZING blog from a real working mom and how she gets dinner on the table every night
  • No Take Out- a dinner recipe emailed to you every morning with directions and a shopping list to feed a family in 30 minutes - genius!
Does cooking with tweens make you want to pull your hair out? Or are you more Zen than me? Please share your tips!

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Watch This With Your Tween Daughter: Facebook COO on Work-Life Balance

We stumbled across this amazing 15-minute talk on women in the workforce and what she would tell her own (now) 2-year old daughter on work-life balance by Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg. Arguably one of the most influential women in business today, Ms. Sandberg speaks eloquently about the challenging facing mothers at work, fathers at home, co-parenting, and role modeling for girls. In her own words, "this speech comes with no judgments" about the choice to stay at home or work, and we think this is a great 15-minutes to spend with our own tween daughters.

This speech was made at the TED Women's Conference in Washington last month, and there are three key points:
  1. Take a seat at the table
  2. Make your partner a true partner
  3. Don't leave before you leave
You can see the whole speech below or on our YouTube channel.



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Martin Luther King Jr. Day and First Tweens' Day of Service


Each year, President Obama calls upon on all Americans to contribute a day of community service to honor Martin Luther King Jr.  The First Family spent their day volunteering at a local Washington school, Stuart Hobson Middle School, sprucing up the buildings and painting. First Tweens Malia and Sasha Obama joined their parents in the painting project and, as it is also First Lady Michelle Obama's birthday, gathered the volunteers to sing "Happy Birthday" to Mrs. Obama.

Photo credit: AP

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Sunday, January 16, 2011

Tallulah Novogratz From Sixx Design Starts Blog For Tweens

You probably know of Tallulah Novogratz from her family's design show on Bravo, 9 By Design. We are huge fans of the show, and our tweens love watching with us. The 12-year old tween and her twin sister, Bellamy, are one of seven children in the brood. Tallulah has as a blog as part of the show in which she discusses the episodes, but last month she launched her own personal blog, Tell Tallulah, where she answers questions asked by other tweens.


About the blog, she says, "I started writing because I love to tell stories and create different kinds of characters.
I often think about a new story during the day and immediately begin writing once I’m home.
Go crazy! Ask me anything! I will answer questions for pre-teens about family, life, friends, school, tv shows, movies, fashion, music, art, photography, writing, travel, and many more.
I’ll begin by sharing a little trivia about myself.  I’m a twin. I’m the third child of seven.  I have a twin sister and five, yes FIVE, brothers. I love the color green, I like writing, photography, drama, sports and art. I love 80’s movies and the tv shows I like are Pretty Little Liars and Glee. Send your questions and comments.  I look forward to hearing from you.
- Tallulah Novogratz"

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Friday, January 14, 2011

Who Benefits From the Battle Over Tiger Mothers?

Our friends at YPulse graciously asked us to comment further on Amy Chua's new book, "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother", and our guest blog post is on their website. Click here to read how the dialogue has continued and reactions from tween girls and their parents. 

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Thursday, January 13, 2011

Some Great Ideas for Tweens' Rooms

We stumbled across these great photos and design ideas for a tween's room on design blog Houzz.com. They have some cool ideas for tweens who share a room, modern/edgy rooms, and very fun colorways.

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A Glee-Inspired Line of Nail Polishes

As if tweens weren't obsessed enough with nail polish, now they can add to their collection with a new line of polishes from OPI inspired by the cast of Glee. Colors include "Slushied", "Gleek Out", and "Mash-Up." These are offered as a limited-edition set from Sephora. Move over Biebs!

Available in February. $9.50/each or or a mini-set for $22

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Wednesday, January 12, 2011

A Chemistry Rock Music Video - Awesome for Tweens

One of our favorite bands of all time is They Might Be Giants - we rocked out to them in college and love that we can share their cool kid-tunes with our own brood today (BTW, how, how, how did we miss them when they came to the Kennedy Center last fall?!?!) . Most of their kid rock albums have been geared to younger ears, but their latest (Grammy nominated - congrats to the Johns!) album is one tweens will get a kick out of: "Here Comes Science."

Check out their music video (with super cool graphics), "Meet the Elements", here:



Perfect if your tween, like our daughters, loves science.

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Tween New Year's Resolution: Unplug

Facebook and texting are now part of life for most tweens - whether or not they have a Facebook profile or a mobile phone, these technologies play a growing role in the social culture of tweens throughout the U.S. We're always vigilant about how much and when our tweens use technology, but in general, we all could "unplug" a bit more. This year, we've made that resolution as entire family.

An article in the New York Times last fall titled "Growing Up Digital: Wired for Distraction" provided some context for our resolution - it tells a cautionary tale of tweens and digital overload:
  • On YouTube: “You can get a whole story in six minutes,” explains a high school junior. “A book takes so long. I prefer the immediate gratification.” 
  • "The technology has created on campuses a new set of social types — not the thespian and the jock but the texter and gamer, Facebook addict and YouTube potato."
  • “If someone tells you about a drama going on with someone,” 14-year old Allison says. “I can text one person while talking on the phone to someone else.” 
  • “I’ll be reading a book for homework, and I’ll get a text message and pause my reading and put down the book, pick up the phone to reply to the text message, and then 20 minutes later realize, ‘Oh, I forgot to do my homework.’ ” 
We thought the article was a useful reminder of the academic dangers of being too plugged in - let us know what you think.

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An Online Science Competition by Google

Google has announced the first global online science competition: the Google Science Fair. Partnering with CERN, LEGO, National Geographic and Scientific American, Google wants to make young scientist the "rock stars of tomorrow."

From their website: "You may have participated in local or regional science fairs where you had to be in the same physical space to compete with kids in your area. Now any student with an idea can participate from anywhere, and share their idea with the world. You build and submit your project—either by yourself or in a team of up to three—entirely online. Students in India (or Israel or Ireland) will be able to compete with students in Canada (or Cambodia or Costa Rica) for prizes including once-in-a-lifetime experiences (like a trip to the Galapagos Islands with a National Geographic Explorer), scholarships and real-life work opportunities (like a five-day trip to CERN in Switzerland). And if you’re entering a science fair locally, please feel free to post that project online with Google Science Fair, too!

Entries must be in by April 4th, and semi-finalists will be announced by mid-May. Best of luck to your tween!

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Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Tween Fashion Blogger Tavi Interviews Gwen Stefani

We're huge fans of creative tween Tavi Gevinson and her fashion blog. Her writing is years ahead of her age, and we think that this interview with icon Gwen Stefani for Teen Vogue really showcases her great style with both word and culture. Enjoy!

Photo credit: Teen Vogue

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Parenting Tweens and the "Tiger Mother"

If you haven't already come across an article on this - don't worry, you will. Yale Law Professor Amy Chua is a Chinese-American and mother of two daughters. She's published a book today called the "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother" in which she explains why Western parents and their permissive parenting styles have it all wrong, and how strict Chinese mothers manage to raise successful children.

The book is an ode to the traditional, strict upbringing of Asian children. Her husband (also a professor at Yale Law) is not Chinese, and they have raised their two daughters both in the Jewish tradition and as Ms. Chua herself was raised - with a very traditional Chinese parenting style. Her book preaches "no playdates, no sleepovers, no school plays, hours of classical music practice a day, and never a 'B' grade."

As expected, the most outlandish comments are being hyped as part of the press tour and in the name of promoting the book: her comments about grades (Chinese kids would never dare to get a B), dating (never), camp (a waste of time), praise (never in public), and self-esteem (a non-issue) are deliberately provoking.

As for me, an Asian parent myself, I find myself asking:
  1. How can a parent claim to have mastered parenting when her own daughters are still teens and not even through the difficult adolescent years?
  2. How can she, or anyone else for that matter, claim to absolutely define and then prescribe parenting success? Isn't it different for each parent and each child?
As adults, we are all products of our own upbringing and struggling to do the best we can with the circumstances we've got. As parents, we develop a parenting style based upon our partners (although sometimes we go it alone), our economic constraints, the neighborhood/village/community surrounding us, and a million other factors. Ms. Chua fails to account for most of these in her "advice," relying instead upon stereotypes of parenting styles that differ from her own.

Have you read this book? Are you an "Asian parent"? Do non-Asian parents settle for mediocre with the kids? What's your take?

UPDATE: More discussion and reactions from tweens on the Tiger Mother here.

Photo credit: Erin Patrice O'Brien for the Wall Street Journal

P.S. My own Asian mom sent me this article to read with a nice "Hah!" to go with it. So Ma, you can see that I do read what you send even when I don't agree with you.

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Monday, January 10, 2011

Very Cool New Play for Tweens by Lemony Snicket

Yours truly went to Cal undergrad, and the good ol' Berkeley Rep is staging the world premiere musical production of Lemony Snicket's "The Composer is Dead". Daniel Handler, a.k.a. Mr. Snicket, lives in or around Berkeley will be on hand to sign copies of his book at the January 15th show.  Tweens will especially love Snicket's characteristic satire and deadpan delivery:

"There's dreadful news from the symphony hall—the composer is dead!
If you have ever heard an orchestra play, then you know that musicians are most certainly guilty of something. Where exactly were the violins on the night in question? Did anyone see the harp? Is the trumpet protesting a bit too boisterously?
In this perplexing murder mystery, everyone seems to have a motive, everyone has an alibi, and nearly everyone is a musical instrument. But the composer is still dead.
Perhaps you can solve the crime yourself. Join the Inspector as he interrogates all the unusual suspects. Then listen to the accompanying audio recording featuring Lemony Snicket and the music of Nathaniel Stookey performed by the San Francisco Symphony. Hear for yourself exactly what took place on that fateful, well-orchestrated evening."

"The Composer is Dead" runs until January 16th at the Berkeley Rep. If you can't make it to California for the show, you can check out a podcast of the author reading from this book here.

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Happy Birthday to Tintin - Tintin Movie Coming in 2011


We grew up reading Tintin comics and love sharing them with our tweens (BTW, these comics are printed in several languages and are a fun way to keep up foreign languages during school breaks). Tintin first appeared in print on January 10, 1929, but a Tintin movie, "The Adventures of Tintin: the Secret of the Unicorn", is slated to come out later this year starring Jamie Bell (the original Billy Elliot) and Daniel Craig (the latest 007). We can't wait!

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Tween New Year's Resolution: Make Family Dinners Fun

We try to eat dinner as a family most nights, but we admit that with the tweens' activity schedules, this gets tougher to do every year. As a family, we need to work hard at maintaining the family dinner ritual, so this year, we're going to make the Bowl of Treasures, a regular thing.

You may remember this idea from this blog last year - it's from Laurie David's book, "The Family Dinner". The idea is set out a large bowl at the beginning of the week and let your kids fill it up with tiny treasures they find. At the end of the week, you set the bowl in the center of the dinner table and take turns hearing about each treasure. For reticent tweens and teens whose daily response to "How was your day?" is "Fine", this tactic worked like a charm.

One of my favorite parts of this new ritual is sharing it when our family dinner table is wider than usual - when friends, neighbors, and guests visit. Everyone has gotten a kick out of it. What tips have helped you keep family dinners on track?

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Saturday, January 8, 2011

Tween New Year's Resolutions: A Mother-Daughter Journal

We are firm believers in the notion that it is never too late to make a change, and we think that this is true also for New Year's Resolutions. In fact, we view the entire month of January as a time for making resolutions, and we find that this gives us time to reflect on the changes we'd like to make, to celebrate small victories, and to borrow great ideas from others.

One great idea to borrow is "journaling".  Journaling is simply the act of keeping a journal, and lots of tweens keep journals as diaries, song books, etc. This year we're going to borrow an idea from Meredith and Sophie Jacobs and keep a mother-daughter journal. It works like this: take a blank book and one person writes a short entry - then trade, and the other person writes an entry commenting on the prior.

We spoke with Meredith at a local book event, and she and her tween have been journaling like this for five years. She says that it's added a new dimension to their relationship and made discussing challenging topics (like puberty) easier.

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Friday, January 7, 2011

Cool Winter Craft for Tweens: A Pom-Pom Scarf

We love this craft for tweens from Disney's Family Fun magazine for a pom-pom scarf. It's perfect for a snow day or sleepover party activity.

All you need is a bag of large pom-poms, a needle, and embroidery floss. Simply thread the needle through 40 pom-poms and knot. Each tween can customize her scarf with pattern and color.

Instructions here.

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Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Tween New Year's Resolution: Pack the Right Gear

Tweens are notorious for running out the door half-packed. I cannot count the number of panicked calls we've received due to forgotten ballet shoes/soccer cleats/swimsuits/you-name-it. To be more prepared is one of our tweens' New Year's Resolutions, so to help them pack what they need in the rainy winter weather, we found these fantastic boots that are so fun, they wouldn't leave home without them. They're by fave tween brand Little Miss Matched. Like their signature socks, these rainboots are designed to go together but have slightly mismatched patterns. And at $20, a lost pair won't mean the end of the world.

Cool rainboots by Little Miss Matched $20

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Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Tween New Year's Resolutions: Writing Thank You Notes

Well, this is more of a whole-family resolution, but taking the time to say "Thank you" for gifts and thoughtful gestures is an important habit to learn. Tweens are old enough to take responsibility for these manners on their own, and ours are pretty good about the annual birthday gift thank you notes.

Make it easy for her to write thank you notes throughout the year with fun, personalized notecards. We LOVE the ones by Design-Her Gals - tweens can customize a printed avatar complete with wardrobe and accessories (even an iPod!) that will be printed on her own stationery. Our friends at Design-Her Gals are currently running a HUGE discount: 40% off! To get this discount, use the code: OOC40 at checkout. You can also feel great about this purchase knowing that a percentage of every sale is donated to the Gal 2 Gal Foundation, an amazing organization that helps women with Stage 4 breast cancer.

A set of 25 custom, flat note cards after the discount is $27.

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What's Cool for Tweens in January: MsTwixt's Calendar

Ms Twixt's Calendar


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Saturday, January 1, 2011

Tween New Year's Resolutions: Getting Up For School on Time

Every year in our house, we all resolve to get up early for school and work. Our eldest tween has discovered an alarm clock to help her keep this New Year's resolution, and we think she may be on to something. The alarm clock is part of a bedside table lamp that mimics the sun's rays as it rises. The idea is that the alarm clock uses light therapy to help one to wake on time. The Rise and Shine Lamp by Verilux and at $149 is pretty pricey (so we're looking for one on eBay).

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